Tyler Oaks on the Move: Getting Lost on Purpose

I get lost all the time. Sometimes my head is far away and I miss turns, sometimes I get in the car without remembering to take directions and sometimes the directions I do take don’t make a whole lot of sense anyway. Getting lost is something that happens to me so often that I’m learning to let go and just accept it. In fact, last week I decided to get lost on purpose.

Even with long walks and spontaneous escapes outside, alone time is hard for me to come by. I prize the rare moments in this universe that I can sit and stare and not have my thoughts interrupted. That’s why sometimes I need to just get lost, and do. I don’t see how I could ever write if I didn’t just disappear every once in a while.

Last week it was for four days: just me, my car and the state of California. Driving from Northern to Southern California was something I hated as a kid (Disneyland aside,) but can’t get enough of as an adult. There is something about an all day or all night drive alone that frees my mind. Four hours into my seven and a half hour trip, I looked at the clock and realized how happy I was. It had taken that long for me to clear my mind of my daily life and finally have the freedom to think by myself for myself, and beyond.

As a rule, what I write when I get lost on purpose is only for me to read. Still, when my mind is freed from everyone and everything else, I find the strength to write as I should when I return home. Maybe my recent trip was essentially about searching out some questions for myself, being at the beach and not having any plans except those that I made for myself at the last minute. What I never expected is how well I would get to know a troublesome character I had been working on before I went away. Although she had tortured me at home, four days into my trip I realized I had everything I needed to know about her. All that was left was to get it down on paper.

Some people are scared to be alone, but as writers we know that being alone is not lonely. Getting lost is a way to be free; to think without the influence of those around us, both those who adore or hate us. Yes, strangers we meet along the way add their own thoughts into our mix. But the beauty is that there is time to think through anyone or anything we allow into our lost time. And of course, there is always that unparalleled seven and a half hour drive home to get everything else all figured out.

Tyler Oaks earned her Bachelor of Arts in Spanish from California State University, Stanislaus and her Master of Arts in Spanish from California State University, Sacramento. Tyler lives in California's Napa Valley with her husband and twin daughters. Tyler is presently at work on her next novel.